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The Sports Fan Misery Index

In economics, the misery index is calculated by adding the inflation rate to the unemployment rate. The Sports Fan Misery Index, developed by the Boston Sports Group, represents the financial and corollary emotional pain experienced by a devoted follower who watches his team lose at home. Using research available from Team Marketing Report, it is calculated by adding together three numbers: the cost of an average ticket (premium seating is not included in this calculation); the cost of parking; and the cost of consolation, or two small beers.

The Misery Index for Lakers fans is a steep $109. 74. This figure includes a ticket @ $89.24; parking @ $13.00; and beers @ $7.50. The Misery Index for Celtics fans is somewhat easier to bear. They pay $65.43 for their ticket; $18.00 for parking; and $5.50 for beer for a total of $88.93. The NBA’s average Fan Misery Index is $66.63 and you can watch the Hornets lose in New Orleans for just $40.58, the lowest figure in the league. Lakers fans who are obliged to economize can always watch the Clippers tank for $77.54.

Followers of the New England Patriots are the most miserable of all fans with a whopping index of $165.34. This figure includes a ticket @$117.84; parking @ 40.00; and beers @ 7.50. Fans of other Boston teams pay about the same to watch them lose as they do the Celtics. Misery Indexes for the Red Sox and Bruins are $83.05 and $86.40 respectively. Red Sox fans will not be pleased to learn that Tampa Bay supporters pay only $22.23 to watch the Rays lose, the lowest figure of any franchise in any sport. Especially galling is the fact that parking for Rays fans is both easy to find and free of charge.

Although Lakers fans are more miserable than Celtics fans, LA sports enthusiasts in general experience less misery than their Boston counterparts. They can see their Dodgers blow it for a paltry $52.61 or the Kings lose for $69.95.